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“I feel the need…the need for speed!”

I don’t get particularly vexed over politics. I don’t complain about the weather. And even though millennials should all be rounded up and fired into the sun, it’s not like I get angry about it.

In other words, I’m a pretty easygoing guy.

Until I get behind the wheel and some jack-wagon is in front of me going less than five miles an hour over the speed limit. That’s when a completely irrational, white-hot rage takes over. Words that would make a sailor blush issue forth with reckless abandon as I wish ill upon the driver and his family. “Why me, God?” I scream as I shake my fist at the sky, “Why have you abandoned me to such a cruel fate?”

So, really, I’m a jerk. But it’s not my fault! Society is to blame – specifically, its relentlessly fast pace. “Things that our great-great-grandparents would have found miraculously efficient now drive us around the bend,” writes Chelsea Wald. “Patience is a virtue that’s been vanquished in the Twitter age.” Basically, she says, our internal clocks are out of whack, “stretching out the wait, summoning anger out of proportion to the delay.”

Swell. Another thing to worry about.



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