Hello? Anyone?

01.18.2012

The somewhat less-than-overwhelming response to yesterday’s post can only mean that

a compelling case for the use of “ask” as a noun cannot be made,
our readership is pitiably small, or
nobody cares much about the rampant abuse of the Queen’s English.

The third possibility is too depressing to believe; the second is simply not worth considering. We’re therefore assuming the first.

But just in case, we’re going to throw a little red meat to our audience to see if anyone’s out there. Ready?

Resolved: “We Built This City” is the stupidest song ever written.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nsdj9NRzqC4&feature=related

To either affirm or negate the resolution, comment below. Whoever identifies a song stupider than “We Built This City” will receive a free bag of Designer Blend coffee—our proprietary brew from Cravens Coffee Company.

Contest closes Thursday, January 19 at 5 p.m. PST. The winner, determined by entirely subjective criteria, will be identified in Friday’s blog post.

Let the insanity begin.

posted by: Aaron Bragg | category: random thoughts | comments(3)

01.18.2012, 4:31pm
by mcw3

I was not aware that “ask” could be used as a noun, so could not defend it. Even now, I cannot think of how to use it as such.

Your resolution could possibly lead to the implosion of Facebook/MySpace/social media in general as the world flames each other in text. And any debate on this matter is probably useless because I am pretty sure the “judges” will be just you, and I am inclined to believe you will agree with yourself. But for the sake of good coffee, I will try. I think “I am a Gummy Bear” could challenge for the stupidest song.

01.19.2012, 6:37am
by Spimbi

Oh, the choices are just endless—from Drop Dead Fred’s “I’m too Sexy” to Don Johnson’s “Hearbeat” to Patrick Swayze’s “She’s Like the Wind.” And who can ever forget Eddie Murphy and Rick James groovin’ to “Party All the Time”? But I think the winner just might be Kris Kardashian/Jenner with the timeless classic “I Love My Friends.”

01.19.2012, 11:11am
by Susanna

In Norse mythology, Odin created the first man from a tree. His name was Ask. A name is a noun; Ask is a name; therefore, Ask is a noun. I win, yes?

And arguably this is one of the worst pairs of lines from a pop song EVER:

“Lucky that my breasts are small and humble
So you don’t confuse them [pause] with mountains.”

That’s from Shakira’s “Whenever, Wherever.” Compound that there couplet with the song’s video and Shakira’s recent post in the Obama administration (something to do with education, in fact), and I think we’ve topped even “Marconi plays the mamba…” in the inanity department.

And as long as we’re one-uppin’ stuff: your blog kills a certain competitor’s. Thanks, thanks, and ever thanks for not sharing pictures of your feet on a scale.

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Hello? Anyone?