The pressure to use jargon—particularly in our profession—can be overwhelming. Why, just the other day, CK said he was going to be “out of pocket.” I myself once used “incent” as a verb.
There’s really no excuse for that. Ever. Thankfully, this easy-to-use tool will ensure it never happens again.
We’ve always believed in the power of words and images working together. This video might help explain why the right message is worth fighting for.
My brother-in-law alerted me to some pretty fine writing from the world of real estate:
Gracefully proportioned and built during an era of classic formality, this quintessential South Slope Manse is truly iconic in stature. Impeccably updated and restored from top to bottom plus surrounded by a profusion of city, Sound and Mountain VIEWS, this turreted grand lady is singular in design but immanently inviting. The magical past is evident everywhere, from the hand painted canvas ceilings and walls to the abundant fenestration and a wrap around porch that whispers “mint juleps
Methinks the writer is a fan of Microsoft Word’s synonym feature. Abundant fenestration? Magical past? And best of all: the use of “immanently”—a term only philosophers and theologians are brave enough to bandy about.
But then, the asking price is just under $3.5 million. So perhaps a ten-dollar word sprinkled here and there is necessary to attract the right audience.
In this business, meetings can be soul-draining time hogs. These philosophy referee signals would sure speed things up.
I think it was Erasmus who said that the desire to write grows with writing. It’s perhaps a bit presumptuous of me to offer an emendation, but I’d like to suggest that the desire to write grows also with subjugation, murder, and general psychopathy.
Which raises an interesting question: does the poetry of Stalin cast the commie thug in a softer light? Or does it merely point to the narcissism prevalent—and apparently necessary—in every dictator? More importantly, If I started ruling with an iron fist, could I get my poetry published?
The estimable Curtis “Caput” Smith, culinary instructor and prize-winning chef, once told me he’s convinced that “if every person on earth would be required to finish every sentence they started, completely, there would be a lot less confusion, anger, and resentment worldwide.”
I think he’s on to something. Call it the “Verbal Mulligan Eradication Act of 2011.”
For one thing, it would force us to choose our words more carefully. For another, it may very well reduce the fillers we use as we think through what we’re trying to, like, you know, um…say. Finally, it would shut a lot of annoying people up.
If you, like Chef Smith, have an idea that has the potential to fundamentally alter the way the world turns, please share. We’ll be happy to broadcast it to the three or four readers of the last word.
It seems that any time someone laments the deterioration of our language, there’s a knee-jerk response from the perpetrators, smugly accusing the other side of being afraid of change.
It’s not change we fear, it’s stupidity. And “LOL” is stupid. Not to mention a wholly unnecessary addition to our “vibrant, evolving” language.
For some reason, Very Important Things seem to happen on April 12.
1633 Galileo goes on trial for heresy
1861 the Civil War begins
1945 FDR dies
1954 Bill Haley and the Comets record “Rock Around the Clock”
1961 Yuri Gagarin becomes the first man in space
1981 the first launch of the space shuttle
If you count the name of Haley’s band, that’s four out of six space-themed events.
Words fail me.
How much is Smaug worth? Michael Noer does the math—so you don’t have to.
The biggest egos I’ve ever seen were in the advertising business—both on the client and the creative side. (We writers, who’d much rather snipe at other writers rather than actually, you know…write, are particularly prone to puffery.) Runner up? Gotta be college professors, whose self-regard seemingly knows no bounds.
Which is why it’s particularly fun to witness one take down another. And when the target is a Harvard professor who just published a book of “half-chewed digressions and butt ends of academic cliché,” why, the bloodlust is almost palpable.
Between 2003 and 2008, shark attacks in the United States resulted in the deaths of four people. During the same time period, 108 people were killed by…COWS.
Popular Mechanics has published a handy list of precautions you can take that might just save your life—like “Trust them and get used to how they work, but don’t trust them so much that you turn your back on them,” and “If you have a cow or bull that you know to be prone to violent outbursts, get rid of it.”
The Suspicions of Mr. Whicher has it all: a creepy Victorian family, an English country manor, a brutal murder, and a brilliant London inspector—one of the eight original officers from Scotland Yard’s new detective force—called in to solve the mystery. And it’s all true. I couldn’t put it down.
People sometimes ask me what it’s like to write for a living. This chart of the writing process pretty much sums it up.
Finally, Wright Thompson makes a pretty compelling case for why we should care about cricket.
SPOKANE, WASH., April 1, 2011 – In a stunning move announced late Thursday evening, Anderson Mraz Design revealed that it has merged with leading agricultural processor Archer Daniels Midland, finally bringing to a close a bitter legal fight over the rights to the letters A, D, and M.
Representatives from the Dallas Museum of Art and the Muscular Dystrophy Association, along with proponents of the doctrine of Mutual Assured Destruction, hadn’t returned phone inquiries as of press time.
Patricia A. Woertz, president of ADM, will assume the role of senior creative director of the new company, as yet unnamed. “How hard can it be?” she asked. “I scrapbook on the weekends, so…”
AMD principal CK Anderson, who, according to witnesses, was last seen boarding a plane to South America with “a very large briefcase,” was unavailable for comment.
ADM shares opened at $36.68 Friday with news of the merger—up nearly 2 percent over Thursday’s close.
Veteran Hollywood writer Rob Long wonders whether 24/7 connectedness—online gaming, texting, instant messaging, tweeting, et al.—is really such a bad thing after all:
[audio:https://helveticka.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Sit-and-Watch.mp3|titles=Sit and Watch]