In these unprecedented times (as nearly every TV commercial now begins), I guess it’s nice to know that Australia is still…Australia: “Two men snuck into a bedroom with machetes after being hired to carry out a stranger’s sexual fantasy of being tied up in his underwear and stroked with a broom, only to discover they had got the wrong address.”
If you’re like me, you’re wondering what a gig like that pays. Five grand, it turns out—but only if it’s “really good.”
Meanwhile, the animal kingdom must be sensing that we’re on the ropes: bears are walking on roofs, people are getting in fist fights with alligators, and there’s a “mystery pig” rooting around a Pennsylvania neighborhood.