If anyone out there can make a persuasive case for this, I’ll buy the first round of drinks at your favorite watering hole. Hell, just give me one good reason why I shouldn’t beat this guy about the head and shoulders with a broken bottle.
If anyone out there can make a persuasive case for this, I’ll buy the first round of drinks at your favorite watering hole. Hell, just give me one good reason why I shouldn’t beat this guy about the head and shoulders with a broken bottle.
Ben Yagoda has a revealing article over at the Chronicle of Higher Education website, in which he correctly identifies the problem with much of today’s writing: unfamiliarity with written English.
“If you haven’t read much, when you set pen to paper yourself, you take things more slowly and apply a literal-minded logic, as you would in finding your way through a dark house.”
Yagoda, a professor of English at the University of Delaware, calls it “clunk.” And while he’s speaking primarily about his students’ work, it’s worth noting that these students eventually become professionals in one field or another—and the ignorance continues unabated.
Like jazz musicians, who, when asked to explain the concept of swing, will usually tell you to put on a record and just listen, Yagoda has some simple advice for those confused by grammar and punctuation: read.
In related news, the folks at Electric Literature demonstrate that a book just might save your life.
The holidays are officially over. But one gift remains to be opened: Dave Barry’s Year in Review. More than Christmas presents, more than hot buttered rum(s), more than the awesome treats we get here at AMD corporate headquarters, this is what I look forward to every year.
The latest PROOF! publication by Johnston Printing is now available, and represents our most intense subject matter to date. The history of Modern architecture in Spokane is nothing short of incredible—and with the story going back well over fifty years, it makes for an interesting challenge.
While the publication itself mentions all of the folks who helped bring this story to life, I’d like to mention three key contributors. First, a special note of appreciation goes to local architect Steve Clark, who helped inspire us to focus on the work of Moritz Kundig. Second, I’d like to acknowledge our writer, Aaron Bragg, whose enthusiasm for this subject proved invaluable in the research and telling of Moritz’s contribution to our landscape. And finally, to our guest designer Linda Anderson, who has the rare ability to understand my scribbles while adding her own visual aesthetic befitting the publication’s theme.
And in case you’re wondering, PROOF! no. 5 is already underway! Look for it in the spring of the coming year.
As we at the last word prepare to settle our brains for a long winter’s nap, we pause to wish everyone a very merry Christmas and a happy new year.
Our gift to you? Some of the most ethereally beautiful music ever composed by man: Arvo Pärt’s Da pacem Domine, performed by the Estonian Philharmonic Chamber Choir.
[audio:https://helveticka.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/01-Da-pacem-Domine.mp3|titles=01 Da pacem Domine]Thanks for reading—and see y’all in 2011!
*If you don’t get the reference, run—don’t walk—to the nearest retailer that stocks DVDs and purchase It’s a Wonderful Life. You can thank me later.
To help combat the daily drudgery of churning out word after word under the baleful watch of a whip-cracking tyrant, I’ve been keeping an orchid in the window at my desk—a reedstem epidendrum that usually blooms in mid-January.
Much to my surprise, the first flower opened over the last weekend, and today there are five.
As I look out my office window at the silent majesty of a winter’s morn; the clean, cool chill of the holiday air; I’m reminded that I’ve been meaning to say something about the hyphen.
Ever hear of a compound modifier? It’s a situation in which two words work together to describe one noun. Like “brown-eyed girl,” for instance. Or “high-jumping grasshopper.”
Both “brown-eyed” and “high-jumping” are compound modifiers; the hyphen is employed to clarify the meaning of the phrase. Because without it, the second example—”high jumping grasshopper”—could very well indicate a jumping grasshopper after one too many bong hits.
Just yesterday, I saw a Wendy’s billboard on Division advertising something called “skin on fries.” Given that the folks at Wendy’s are surely smart enough to know the compound modifier/hyphen rule, it can only mean that the fast-food chain, in an apparent homage to The Silence of the Lambs, has come up with an entirely new way to season your fries.
Discover magazine’s Bad Astronomy blog has picked the year’s best astronomy photos. Among the more interesting is a remarkable close-up (taken within 2,000 miles) of an asteroid named Lutetia.
Be sure to click on each image to embiggen.
You can have your wassail, your Yule log, your figgy pudding; around here, nothing says “Christmas” quite like a little Bob Dylan:
[audio:https://helveticka.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/07-The-Christmas-Blues1.mp3|titles=07 The Christmas Blues]Alas, it won’t be in time for Christmas, but it appears that a U.S. importer is set to bring haggis-flavored potato chips to our shores.
According to my copy of Brewer’s Dictionary of Phrase and Fable (18th ed.), haggis is a traditional Scottish dish “made from the heart, lungs and liver of a sheep or calf, chopped up with suet, oatmeal, onions and seasonings, and boiled like a big sausage in a sheep’s stomach bag.”
Delicious.
Gervase Markham, in his English Housewife (1615), has more to say:
…and this small oatmeal mixed blood and the Liver of either Calfe, Sheep or Swine maketh that pudding which is called haggas, or haggus, of whose goodness, it is in vain to boast because there is hardly to be found a man that does not affect them.
By the way, the chips won Product of the Year at the 2010 Scottish Food and Drink Excellence Awards.
The phrase “take a different tact” seems to be rearing its ugly head more often these days. Perhaps I’m more sensitive than most to the dissonant clang it makes upon the ears; maybe it’s because I’m doomed to spend a lot of time with people who like the way my face contorts every time they say it.
So let’s just go ahead and fix it, shall we?
The correct phrase is “take a different tack.” Tack is a nautical term for the position of a vessel relative to the trim of its sails. Tacking is the act of bringing a ship into the wind in order to change course or direction.
Get it? A new approach is a different tack. But it doesn’t always require tact.
Which came first, Coke or Pepsi? Wal-Mart or Kmart? Take the quiz over at Mental Floss—some of the answers may surprise you.
Courtesy of the inestimable Mike Miller—who might very well be The Smartest Person Alive— the last word now has an audio player. Which means it’s easier than ever for y’all to taste our sweet beats.
Go on, now. Get the party started:
[audio:https://helveticka.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/12/01-What-Is-Hip_.mp3|titles=01 What Is Hip_]So let me set the scene. It was the happy hour portion of AMD’s holiday gathering last week. We were at a downtown establishment enjoying various spirits when our writer, Aaron Bragg, was given a manly test. Choosing from among twenty-one offerings on the menu, I ordered him a Scotch—neat. As a whisky aficionado (as well as bourbon), his challenge was to identify which Scotch he was about to imbibe.
He quickly determined it was a blend (certainly not a single malt!), thus narrowing his choices down to four brands. Sensing the quality of the product, he casually eliminated two groups—Dewars and Cutty Sark (a little too easy)—leaving only Chivas Regal’s 12- and 18-year-old blends and Johnnie Walker’s red, black, and blue labels.
Apparently, it wasn’t sweet enough to be a Chivas. (At this point, we’re all beginning to wonder just how much Scotch this man drinks.) So it’s now down to Johnnie Walker. But which one?
More swirls and sips followed, confirming it had been aged at least ten years (Red is way too young, you see), and narrowing it down to the Black (aged at least 12 years) and Blue (age not given, but generally understood to be more than 20 years, apparently). He stroked his goatee, took the final delightful sips, and, declaring it was “smooth as a baby’s butt,” gave us his answer: Johnnie Walker Blue Label.
Amazing! Now at $29 a glass, I don’t think this is his usual pour. But keeping your manly writer happy is a good thing. And on this evening, the best Scotch on the menu made him as happy as he could be.
The National Post’s Robert Fulford has the goods on “one of the great comeback stories in the history of competitive punctuation.”
Personally, I’ve never been much of a fan of the #, as I find it a bit inelegant and unwieldy. And the fact that it owes its resurrection to something as inane as Twitter, whose users—Twits?—had the cheek to rename it a “hashtag,” makes me even less likely to employ it.
These days, however, it’s nice to see punctuation used at all.